We are a couple weeks into the year. Some resolutions are starting to fade, some are sticking. The most exciting part of change is that you can start it anytime of the year. Change can happen this year. Here are some simple things you can do now even without a resolution and create an atmosphere of connection and change.
- Be Thankful – Show gratitude – Focus on what they do right and forgive what they do wrong. Make trust and forgiveness your default mode. Make a point to say thank you more than you say I’m sorry. Read, Gratitude Changes Everything and Gratitude Given or Received Creates Life to get more insight
- Make Sex a Priority – I am surprised at how many couples that get to busy, tired or angry to make sex a priority. You miss the closeness and repair that is created by connecting sexually.
- Grow As A Person – You share who you are and what you emotionally and intellectually own. Continue to grow as a person you will enjoy yourself and others more. If you own more peace, joy and happiness you have more to share. Read To Change Your Marriage You Must Change Yourself – 2 Things To Help You Start This Year and God Change My Situation to get more insight.
- Compromise – This is the work of marriage. If your goal is to be right or get your way, you probably won’t be happy. Read 6 Arguments that Every Couples Has to get more insight.
- Connect – Create regular shared experiences where you can laugh, play, encourage, affirm, and non-sexually touch. Read Happy Marriages and to get more insight.
- Kiss Hello and Goodbye for 10 or More Seconds Every Day – Kiss to start the day and kiss to end the day. The kiss needs to be more than a “peck”.
- Pray Together Daily – Invite and include each other into your faith.
- Hug Each Other Daily – The warmth and connection of a daily hug is vital. Now the hug I mean is not just a awkward pat and move on. What needs to happen daily is a hug that lasts 10 to 15 seconds. Read this Marriage Tip to get more insight.
- Try To Go To Bed Together – Don’t go to bed angry, but go to bed together. When couples choose to go to bed at separate times you miss the connection and the sharing of words or touch that each of you need.
- More Positive – This is the highest predictor of divorce. The ratio of positive to negative interaction that a couples has can predict divorce. For every negative comment or interaction in a relationship you need at least 7 to 10 positives to create happiness. Read What is Your Focus – positive or negative? to get more insight
- Ask – Show interest and concern for the needs of your spouse. Ask them how can you serve them more this year.
- Here are some other posts that may give more insight – 25 Tips for the Young Husband…(well I guess any husband)! and 25 Tips for the Young Wife…(well I guess any Wife)! and 10 Hours a Week to Affair and Divorce Proof Your Marriage
I wanted to give you some thoughts for this new year. Make a commitment to look back over 2015 and see how you made choices to make your relationship better.
What would you add or subtract from this list? What areas are you good at and what areas need to grow?