Grace is what all of us long to experience in our relationships, the problem is we usually have a hard time giving grace to each other.  A definition of Grace is giving or receiving unmerited favor.  Giving someone something that they do not deserve.  We see grace in our relationship with Christ when He loves us, forgives us and is always with us when we don’t deserve it.  Is it possible for a couple to relate to each other this way?  I think the goal of every couple is to give grace to each other.

The ability to extend grace is one of the qualities that strong thriving couples posses. Creating an attitude of grace will help you to accept and love yourself and your partner.  Every partner despite their best intentions, are fallible and imperfect. It’s easy to show grace to people who treat you well and do what you want.  It is much harder to show grace to those who offend you or with whom you disagree. Grace creates an attitude of acceptance, patience and love that allows us to look beyond struggles and conflict and respond with kind words or a hug instead of silence or scorn. So rather than reacting with statements to your partner like, ‘How could you be so stupid?’ or ‘We wouldn’t be having this problem if only you wouldn’t have done that,’ you can learn that the best option is to extend grace instead.

True grace is empowered buy the love of Christ.  If you struggle to give grace to yourself or others spend time pondering the love of Christ.  He fully and completely loves you. God will grow your capacity to give and receive grace as you walk with Him.

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 ESV

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV

Grace means there is nothing I can do to make God love me more, and nothing I can do to make God love me less. Philip Yancey