Connected couples remember. They look back at their shared history fondly. They remember how they met and how positive they felt. They talk about how they fell in love. They even talk about the tough times. They admire and draw strength from the struggles that they have made it through. This type of remembering creates new warm emotions about the joys and experiences from your shared past.
“Never make your home in a place. Make a home for yourself inside your own head. You’ll find what you need to furnish it–memory, friends you can trust, love of learning, and other such things. That way it will go with you wherever you journey.” –Ted Williams
A long time ago my wife and I started talking about memories of our past. We would remember how we had met. When we fell in love. How we made up after fights. These memories helped us to connect to our shared story. The highs and lows, the joy and hope of knowing we could make it through the hard stuff. These intimate times of remembering have created connection and hope.
“Never throughout history has a man who lived a life of ease left a name worth remembering.” –Theodore Roosevelt
This is one of the areas research shows that happy connected couples regularly do. I have been surprised at how some couples do this in a natural unconscious way. Other couples are afraid to try because of pain from the past. Don’t allow fear to keep your from celebrating the precious gift of your shared story. Scripture says that we will defeat the enemy through the word of our testimony, (Revelation 12:11). You can begin to change the pain of the past by recognizing the strength and beauty that the pain created. Choose to remember and celebrate your connection. The encouragement of your story can give you the courage to face the future. I think the intimate habit of remembering your shared story can be life giving. Remembering can create connection and the affirmation that “I still choose you“.
We do not remember days…. We remember moments