Every couple argues.  That’s not a surprise, but what is a surprise is that strong and struggling couples have the same arguments.  The only difference is how the arguments  begin  and how they repair.  If the argument begins in a harsh, attacking or accusing way, you will likely not get to solutions. The argument stays stuck with the first defensive reaction and never goes forward.  Repair after an argument looks a lot like Romans 8.  We may disagree but I am not trying to condemn you (Romans 8:1).  I won’t allow any argument or disagreement to  separate us (Romans 8:35-39).

Every couple throughout the life of their marriage will argue about the six topics below:

For years my wife and I have played with the question, if we could sit down and spend an afternoon and talk to ourselves as the young couple that got married at age twenty-one, “What would we say to them?”  What advice would we give ourselves?

After thirty-two years of marriage and counseling couples for twenty years, one thing I am confident of….a man’s life is richer when he has a wife.  I know that may sound odd, but the evidence and research indicate that the women in our lives bring us joy, happiness, health and simply put a good life.  Women – our lives would be much less without you.

I recently posted about some of the tips I would have given to the young  husband.  Here is a list for wives.

I have pondered what advice would I give if I could go back and talk with myself as a young husband. What would I tell him? That got me writing, here are some quick thoughts. I don’t think this is comprehensive, but a good list to start with. Ladies here is a good list for wives.

Connected Together Marriage Conference is designed with these things in mind.  I don’t want to just give you another thing to do.  I think we have created an experience that will give you helpful and practical information.  I don’t want to give you just another meeting, but I do want to help you to develop skills that will impact your marriage.

Connected Together Marriage Conference

Register for the Connected Together Marriage Conference!

When people say marriage is work…what does that mean?  Is it just all drudgery, and mundane.  I don’t think so.  The work of marriage is compromise and connection.  Both of these require an effort to make them work.  

Often I get questions like “what can I do now that will help to improve my marriage?”  Most real changes take time. To find happiness with your spouse you need to be willing to put in effort. The challenges that every relationship has will help you develop character.

Here is a quick list of some fun easy things you can do that will impact your marriage.

“Coming Together is the beginning.  Keeping Together is progress.  Working Together is success.” – Henry Ford.

Together is a wonderful thing.  It should be the goal, we should settle for nothing less. We were NOT meant to be alone.  Life will pull you apart. Busyness will create separate goals.  You have to work at creating connected relationships that celebrate and enjoy being together.  Here are five simple ways to Connect Together.  

• Eat Together – You have to eat, make it a shared experience.  

• Try To Go To Bed Together – The shared experience of sleeping together is one of the experiences you should only have with your spouse. Learn to enjoying “spooning” together if only for a few minutes each night.  Non-sexual touch is vital for the health of the relationship.    

• Date Night – Create time together for a date night in the house, like movies and popcorn sitting together on the sofa, or even better, plan a date out.  

• Work On Projects Together – The common goal of working and accomplishing something together is important.  

• Commit To Trying New Things – Try new food, places and music.  Be flexible and try new things.  We encourage our children to do this. Why do we stop?  The joy of something new can help you feel connected together.  

Connecting together takes work and effort. It should be enjoyable work.  The effort has to be intentional, consistent and fun. What things would you add to the list?